Alone without the boy…


My boy is away for a few days visiting his grandparents that live around 2 hours away. He doesn’t get to see them very often maybe a few times a year during school holidays. Right up until the moment his Nana was about to leave with him he was saying “Are you sure you are going to be ok? I can cancel this if you like?” Life is a lot harder at the moment but I do have my mum just 10 mins away and friends close by – I don’t want him to ever feel that he has to stay home to look after me. I will just live very simply for a few days – as I am unable to cook at the moment with my left hand just not being able to hold anything. I have prepared ahead of time to make sure I have meals that can just go in the microwave and that aren’t too difficult to open with one hand 🙂

Jacob has to be able to have his life – that he can go away without stressing about me. My personal carer starts tomorrow morning – she will be here 3 days a week – Monday, Wednesday and Friday and I believe that will have to help with his stress as well – having someone here for an hour – most days. She will shower, shampoo, dry and dress me. To be completely honest, this was a really hard to let go of. At 42 I never dreamed that I would need someone to shower me? I guess sometimes I would wonder what the future would hold for me with CRPS and I had mentally planned for wheelchairs and carers but I still thought this would be some time into the future. I am more than happy to have someone come in once a fortnight to clean etc..that is brilliant and takes a little stress off Jacob but I guess I never forsaw me having to be showered a year and a half into this illness. The pain I go through showering myself is off the chart and I have never been able to work out why? I know that I need to use my left hand a lot..twisting and holding things but now I am starting to think it is the vibration and the temperature of the water. I am open for suggestions as to what I can put over my wrist when I am being showered. I was thinking of somehow cutting both ends out of a a 2L milk carton and somehow attaching it a la a “Wonder Womans” magic cuffs! But I can’t work out how to do it.

So all in all I face my personal carer tomorrow…I hope we hit it off as we will be spending a lot of time together.



1 Comment (+add yours?)

  1. Nayleen Abbott
    Jan 24, 2013 @ 22:41:56

    this is a really good idea Sharon, documenting it all gives me a much better idea of what you are going through. I knew it was rough and you knew you have lots of freinds. Just give me a call and let me know what you need.. love you babe.. Nayleen


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